Trust is essential in a relationship where physical distance is a constant challenge. Is this something you built over time or did you have it from the beginning?
My initial thought is that it's always a work in progress. Relationships are constantly evolving, just like our lives. Having trust, particularly when faced with the physical distance, evolves over time. It’s an ongoing process. Managing expectations; understanding each other and the reality of the situation. Ultimately, trust and realistic expectations go hand in hand. The distance sometimes can do more harm than good. Trust isn't a fixed state; its an on going effort. It's important to communicate about feelings and expectations.
How do you balance personal life/work life with the demands of their husband's career?
I have adjusted my life around his schedule. Tour and the studio commitments have always dictated our routines. Everything, even our kids schedules have revolved around that. However, now that my children are older, I have the opportunity to establish my own thing and identity, feeling less tied to his.
How do you support your husband, both emotionally and logistically?
I often feel like I'm secretly playing the role of a personal assistant and manager. Beyond just our family dynamics, I find myself helping him with personal reminders too. It’s like I have to keep track of things that he might forget. It’s a bit like being an unnoticed assistant—something even Bill wouldn’t necessarily recognize.
The demands of the road can take a toll on both physical and mental health. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle can be challenging with irregular schedules, lack of routine, and constant
With Bill, he is taking charge of his health and well-being, and I don’t feel the need to oversee, get in the way, or manage things anymore. I had at one time when his health was poor and he wasn’t able to do so. Now he has established a routine at home as well as one for when he's on the road. I have my own routine and mental health as my focus more these days.
What are some of the biggest challenges you & your husband face, such as post tour dopamine drop or dealing with time apart, or the pressures of your careers?
Communication is a challenge for us. Over the years, we've developed a pattern where we don’t communicate extensively when we're apart. It’s often hardly at all. When he's on tour, our worlds feel so different that we don’t communicate much, unless something important arises. As for reconnecting, we usually do so when he’s home during breaks. We have our routines and activities that we do together. Even then, we maintain our independence, which makes our relationship unique. So, our quality time really is at home and occasionally I still make it out on tour.
What do you find most rewarding about being a tour wifey?
As a music lover, I can appreciate my husband’s career. It has given me the opportunity to travel, attend shows, and be part of something unique that I truly love. This lifestyle isn’t typical, and while it has its ups and downs like any other relationship, I joined into something that was already established before I came along. I knew what I was getting into, and I understand that being a tour partner isn’t for everyone. However, the experience of meeting and forming friendships in music has created a whole other family for me and the kids. It’s a very special thing. At the same time, the separation allows both of us to enjoy our independence. I believe we both benefit from that.