Staying grounded in my feminine energy, even in a touring world that's heavily shaped by masculine energy, is something I’ve learned to do naturally over time. On stage, I tap into a more 'masculine' place energetically—embracing that fierce, powerful, assertive side of myself—but even when I’m in that space, I am still fully feminine in my essence. The stage becomes a place of balance where both energies coexist, allowing me to express strength and vulnerability simultaneously.
Our greatest musical icons—Madonna, David Bowie, Mick Jagger—are all perfect examples of how fluid and powerful these energies can be. They didn't just play with gender and energy on a surface level; they embodied both masculine and feminine traits in their performances and artistry. They blurred the lines between these categories, showing us that you don’t have to choose one or the other. In fact, the magic happens when you honor both sides of yourself, allowing them to coexist in a way that feels authentic and powerful. This is something I carry with me in my own work, ensuring that my essence remains rooted in balance, no matter what the outside world expects or demands.
As a woman in the music industry, navigating a space traditionally dominated by masculine energy can be challenging, but it also offers the opportunity to challenge norms and redefine power. You don’t have to subscribe to one energy over the other; you can express both, depending on the situation or what your art demands
When you’re touring with your partner, it’s easy for the lines between personal and professional roles to blur. How do you stay balanced with both roles?
As I am a musician myself, when I tour with Jim as a “rock wife” or “off-duty musician”, the only real difference is that I am not the one who walks on stage to perform! The performance aspect of touring is really only a fragment of the time spent out on the road. Most of it is waiting around! As I am very much accustomed to this lifestyle I can really get into the flow of life on the road. I have never really known a life outside of being a touring musician or being married to one!
The demands of the road can take a toll on both physical and mentally. Such as…Maintaining a healthy lifestyle can be challenging with irregular schedules, constant movement, navigating the post-tour emotional crash when the dopamine drops and the endless cycles of highs and lows. What are some of the biggest challenges you & your husband face?
Touring definitely takes a toll—physically, mentally, and emotionally. One of the biggest challenges Jim and I face is the irregular schedule and the constant movement. It’s not just about performing every night—it’s the long hours of travel, the time zone changes, and the exhaustion that can accumulate over weeks or months on the road. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle while juggling all of this is essential.
For me, I’ve learned that it’s important to find moments of stability within the chaos. I am always able to make sure I am eating properly. I make time to work out in new cities all the time. I love pilates and barre based workouts! One time I accidentally took a dance cardio class in German! These things help me stay grounded and energized. I also prioritize sleep as much as possible, I shower and get into my pajamas immediately after a show. I keep a routine, even when it feels like everything is constantly in flux.
On the mental side, the post-tour emotional crash is real. There’s this adrenaline high from the energy of the shows, the excitement of the crowd, and the sense of accomplishment. But once that dopamine rush drops, it can feel like a sudden shift. Jim and I both experience this to varying degrees, and we’ve learned to manage it by focusing on self-care and making time to reset emotionally. When you're constantly in high-energy mode, it can feel jarring to return to 'normal life' after the tour ends. We like to book a beach vacation soon after a tour so we can really just enjoy being in nature and having that as an in-between space to connect tour life to “regular life” back at home.
What do you find most rewarding about being a tour wifey?
I find it incredibly rewarding to see Jim in his element—on stage, performing with The Stray Cats - they have been friends since childhood! There’s a sense of pride and fulfillment in watching him do what he loves and being part of that energy, even if I’m not the one on stage myself. As a musician, I also appreciate the behind-the-scenes moments—the planning, the creativity, the work that goes into each show—and it’s gratifying to witness all the effort that goes into making it all come together.